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Application to Date my Daughter

Note: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage and current medical report from your doctor.

1. Name:_____________________________ Date of Birth____________
2. Height:___________________ Weight:_________ I.Q.:___________G.P.A._____
3. Social Security #:____________________ Driver'sLicense#:________________
4. Boy Scout Rank:___________________________________________
5. Home Address:________________ City, State_________ Zip:______________
6. Number of years your parents married:_____________________
Do you have one (1) MALE and one (1) Female parent?___________________
7. Do you own a van? ______ A truck with oversized tires?__________
A waterbed?_________________
8. Do you have an earring, nose ring or belly button ring?____________
Anything pierced?_______
9. Do you have a tattoo?__________________________________________
(if you answered yes to #8 or 9, please do not fill out the rest of the
application and leave at once)
10. In 50 words or less, what does LATE mean to you?
________________________________________________________________
11. In 50 words or less, what does DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER mean to you?_____________
12. In 50 words or less, what does the term ABSTINENCE mean to you?_____________
What church do you attend:_______________________
How often:______________________
What would be the best time to interview your father, mother, and minister?______________________________
When would be the best time to collect a full set of fingerprints and photograph?______________________________
When is the best time to for a complete credit and FBI background check to be completed?________
Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely. All questions will be confidential. (That means I won't tell anyone... I promise)
A. If I were shot, the last place on my body I would want to be wounded
is in the ___________.B. If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is
my____________________.C. A woman's place is in the____________________.
D. The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about
is_______________________________________________.
E. When I first meet a girl, the thing I notice about her first
is:______________________.
What do you want to be IF you grow up?____________________________
I swear that all the information supplied above is true and correct to
the best of my knowledge under penalty of death, dismemberment, native
american ant torture, electrocution, chinese, water torture and red hotpokers.
__________________________ (signature)
Thank you for your interest. Please allow four to six weeks for
processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved.
Please do not try to call or write. If you application is rejected, you
will notified by two gentlemen wearing white ties, coats and carrying
violin cases.